Much to be thankful for

This year was a very thankful Thanksgiving. Chris and I spent the holiday at his parent's house with his brother, sister and her husband. The drive down was a rough one as I already suffer from years of motion sickness, then slap on a couple weeks of morning sickness and we have a recipe for disaster. At this point we had no intentions of sharing our good news just yet, but it was looking as if we may not have a choice due to my lack of ability to pull off a such a lie, i.e. pretending to feel okay when I obviously did not. Yes, we could of easily said I didn't feel well, which wouldn't of been a stretch, but I was more concerned of the obvious. Just as my coworkers had figured out, I was worried his mother would figure out our little secret once I was rushing to the restroom to vomit every time I smelt the turkey or other normally delicious Thanksgiving foods. And, I was right. The moment we walked in the door, me carrying my pillow and a sack of saltines, Chris' mother pulled Chris aside to ask if there was something she should know. Chris, who has become a pro at this secret business told her no, but she later confessed she had her suspicions. Throughout the day I did my best to be helpful, breathing out my mouth and staring at Chris when my mother in law asked me to arrange the green olives and pickles. After a quick discussion with Chris and admitting I didn't know how much longer I could do this, we decided to let our family in on the gig. So, while sitting around the dinner table with full bellies, Chris let out the words, "I lied. You're going to be grandparents." I was just as shocked as his family, as there was no leading up to it, there was no discussion before hand, or sentimental words as a prelude. So long story short, his parents could not have been more happy and excited, as his brother had already known since he has been living with us.
The rest of the day played out as usual and after another disastrous drive home we decided to wait until the next day to tell my family as they were getting a late start to their meal far away back in Kansas. Telling my family over speaker phone was not ideal, but it was still a special moment. Yesterday I was able to talk to my parents individually to further fill them in on the details and answer their questions. All in all, this has been a special holiday in which we have so much to be thankful for. We have wonderful and supportive family who love us deeply. We have healthy bodies to carry us through these next few months. We have been given a miracle we weren't expecting, but somehow has turned into a blessing. And we have an everlasting God who's love is never ending. 

It has been a nice weight lifted off the shoulders to now be able to share in this experience with those we love. As for the rest of our friends and family, you'll soon be reading this after Christmas;)

Baby Scare

As I have said many times, I have constant anxiety that something will go wrong during this first trimester. There are many things that can go wrong during an entire pregnancy, but I've been focused on these next few weeks more than anything. So, as a first time expecting mother, I jump at every pain and worry about every cramp and this last Tuesday was no different. For the first time I experienced piercing pain unlike the other growing pains I have felt along the way. This pain was specific and was coming from the right side of my abdomen, where I had suspected my right ovary to be. So, of course, I googled every possibility. I know, maybe the wrong thing to do. None the less, it was official. I was convinced that I was having a tubal pregnancy. I did not sleep that night and first thing that morning I called my doctor's office to schedule an immediate ultrasound. Even though my concerns were viable, they had no room for an emergency appointment until after the holidays. Now, by this point I was no longer worried about the baby, but my own well being if this was in fact a tubal pregnancy, which can be very dangerous for a mother. Thankfully I was called back and they were able to squeeze me in to an afternoon appointment. Chris was able to get away from work and met me at the doctor's office. So, after a half hour appointment and many questions later, Chris and I walked away with this, our baby's first picture (the little blob to the left in the black bean looking circle, lol):

Our sweet baby is nestled safely in my tummy exactly where he/she should be. The heart beat is a strong 154 bpm and is 1.3 cm long, which is right on track. Research shows that if by your first ultrasound, the baby is not a week behind in those areas, then our chances for a miscarriage decrease significantly. But, again, we still have a long ways to go! The pains I was experiencing are gone now and I am fine. Also, we have found out our due date is two days before we were originally told. These past few weeks I've been starting a new week on Monday. Turns out my new week starts on Saturday, making me 8 weeks pregnant yesterday. Our new due date is set for July 7, 2012 - one day after Chris' father's birthday, who as you know, is struggling with cancer. Amazing how God works and how thankful we are :)

To my baby

Chris and I can not take all the credit to creating you, little bean. You were planned for us long before you were a vision in our dreams. For you were fearfully and wonderfully made by a creator who is a loving and merciful God and will forever hold you close to Him. May you know Him in ways beyond your own understanding.

Blueberries

Week 7: Plenty of good news. According to our nurses, my bought of morning sickness (which last through the whole day) is actually a good sign. It's a sign that my body and hormones are doing what they are suppose to be doing and morning sickness is actually a sign that my pregnancy is going well. This gives me a short sigh of relief as I am in constant worries of something going wrong in this first trimester.

In other good news, Chris' shot training went very well and is now allowed to give me shots from home. I was very impressed with the lack of pain and discomfort I was in during the whole experience :) Other than that, everything else is about the same. Vomit on the verge every waking hour of the day, the smelling power of a Chesapeake Bay Retreiver, and a bladder the size of a penny. Cravings include salty snacks: crackers and chips. Daily foods that don't upset my stomach include saltines, cottage cheese, pears, and appleseauce. Don't know if I'm proud to say that last night at 9 o'clock was my first run to the store to satisfy a craving that would not go away - for strawberry ice cream. I probably looked a little silly walking in to HyVee in my pj's and walking away with only one pint of strawberry and peach ice cream. I had the guts to park in the 'Expecting Mothers' parking spot closest to the entry, just for fun. Don't know how often I'll actually do that. Feels a little weird.

Little bean is now the super size of a blueberry. Most of the growth in concentrated in the head where brain cells are forming at a rate of 100 per minute. Eyelids are covering my baby's eyes in which they already have color. Baby's mouth and tongue are forming and so are his/her arms and legs. The tail is diminishing and will be completely gone in a few short weeks. Chris and I have our first ultrasound and OB appointment next week. I am very excited and very nervous. I hope everything looks the way it's suppose to!

New Development

So, I've been catching up on my reading about what to expect and tips for pregnancy, and there are some things I read that just sound ridiculous, such as some of these crazy symptoms someone may experience when pregnant. Well, starting today (maybe yesterday) I have suddenly obtained the super power of smell. Today at lunch, I was able to identify every coworkers meal choice as soon as it was opened, even though the microwave is 30 ft from me. Scents have become so strong, it's almost overpowering. I have learned the ability to breath through my mouth to avoid sniffing the many smells of the world (lotion, food, hair spray, even the smell of outside). Depending on what mood I'm in, these smells can be dangering. I can say that it definitely does not help a nauseous stomach!

On a different note, tomorrow Chris gets trained on how to give me progesterone shots. I am currently getting 2ml of progesterone twice a week to aid in supporting the growing baby. When getting blood work to confirm my pregnancy, they checked my hormone levels which came back low. So, currently I have to leave work twice a week to get these shots in which Chris will now be able to give me from the comfort from our own home. Needless to say, I don't know how I feel about it, although it will be more convenient. Chris on the other hand, is very excited about it. Then again, he is a medical nerd. I'll fill you in how it goes next post!

Baby Bean

I will admit, at some point I will probably show a couple of pics of the growing belly for my mom and sister who are countless hours away who will not be able to share in this experience with me as much as I would like. But, until I even show more than what looks like a bad case of over eating, I will spare you the 'show'. Now, on to the more miraculous (or T.M.I) details of our growing baby!

Week 6: So has begun the days of morning sickness and food cravings, and they are in full swing! With each passing day I become more and more nauseous with only a few foods that seem edible. I am not having any serious food cravings that are on going, but more of an instant impulsive food thought that doesn't seem to go away until I have it. For example: beef lo mein, Arby's french dip, mashed potatoes and gravy, and chocolate ice cream. Otherwise, just the mere thought of every day food, such as spaghetti or chicken, make me want to vomit (although I haven't yet, fingers crossed!). So far I've become very good friends with Campbell's soup and saltine crackers. 

It's been very difficult to mask my queasy belly from coworkers, as I have already been asked once if I'm pregnant when I admitted I couldn't eat my lasagna for lunch and had to switch to someone else's chicken noodle. My nauseated state so far starts as early as when I first wake up until I lay down to go to sleep. Thankfully it doesn't keep me up at night, but constant runs to the restroom to relieve my bladder definitely do - and my poor husband. 

I have already checked my list of no-no's, such as deli meat, caffeine, sushi, and of course alcohol. This may make the secrecy of pregnancy difficult to hide with close friends over the course of the next few weeks, or Chris will be drinking for us both! As for Chris, he has been amazing. Already going to the store for me and rubbing my back when I'm tired. I could get use to this treatment!

Now for our little miracle. He/she is currently the size of a lentil bean. The head has begun to take shape and facial features are beginning to mold. Baby bean currently looks like a sea monkey, tail and all, as arm buds are starting to sprout. As early as this week the gender of the baby is making it's choice, although obviously we won't be able to find out until way later. I'm okay with this, I just hope to make it that far, as the first trimester is the most fragile phase. We are currently looking for a doctor, preferably a female, as the doctor we had hoped for does not support our health insurance. We are considering a recommended OB-GYN at the Women's Hospital, but they won't see patients until they are in their 8th week of pregnancy. So we still have a ways to go.

Whew. It's been nice to get this all out, even though you won't read this until another 7 weeks. Wow, you'll have a lot of catching up to do! ;)

Eggo my Preggo

As I secretly start this blog, I cannot wait to share this exciting news with you all! Chris and I found out last week we are going to be a mommy and daddy! Surprise to us? Yes! Were we trying? NO! We were so shocked that we took THREE pregnancy tests to really confirm what we were seeing on those test strips. You can't see very well in the picture, but those are 6 red lines on those tests. And after a blood test last Monday, the truth is really starting to set in. Either way we were more than thrilled to find out the incredible plan our dear Lord has set before us! Now, it is still early. I will be 6 weeks pregnant tomorrow. As of right now, Chris and I are the only ones who know about the little miracle growing in my tummy. We have decided that it was best to keep the news to ourselves until we have past the first trimester where miscarriages are at the highest rate. So, until then, I will continue to share my experience in this secret blog until we are able to tell those we love this amazing news and then you can read how I've been handling pregnancy when I'm able to make this blog public!

With my mind spinning, I continue to pray every day for this incredible blessing. Whatever comes from this experience, I pray that my body and my soul are strong enough to endure what lies ahead of me. I pray for the health of my mind and body to create a safe and loving home for the next 9 months of my unborn baby's life inside my belly. I pray that I am able to enjoy every moment of this experience, whether it ends in joy or sorrow. And I pray that I give my Lord God my worries and doubts and rely on His plan for my life, for I know He will never forsake me. Amen.